On Stage.

I figured something out!

No.. Like... this is HUGE

I figured out something that has potential to save my next relationship.

Ok, background stories first.

Story #1

(not really a story.. just more of a fact)

I love performing.

I always have, 

I love dancing around, singing, and taking on a whole new role of "who" I am.

 I would rather be on stage dancing,

or in front of a camera lip syncing,

Than just about anywhere else at any time.

  I feel most comfortable in my own skin when I'm performing.

(note: if you egg me on at all... I will perform. It's not hard to get me to put on a show)

Story #2

I was eating dinner with a friend (of... 7 years?)

and he sat there and talked about how frustrating it is to be around me because

I can not take a compliment. 

(I got him to admit I've gotten a kabillion times better over the years)

And it's not that I'm bashful when someone compliments me,

I just flat out don't believe them. 

I try.

I want to.

But I don't. 

Or even if I do believe them, I don't think it's anything special.

It's frustrating for everyone involved and I hate it.

So. 

My realization.

The man I marry... will just have to know this about me,

(while I will continue to work on just taking a compliment)

He'll know the way to tell me he thinks I look nice is in a dramatic applause. 

No.

 looking nice = golf clap

looking really good = real clap

Happy to be with me, thinks I have a good personality (er something) = standing ovation. 

People lie when they talk,

but no one lies when they applaud.