The Girl

There are times in my life where I think reality becomes overwhelming. Where I just need to breath. I need to be whisked away in a fantasy with no basis on actual events. So I should read right? Yeah I know you'd think with this specific desire I'd be a total Harry Potter fan huh. well I'm not. I don't like fantasy.

So what in the world am I talking about?

I don't know actually. I think whether I need it or not I just enjoy getting caught up in a dream. I enjoy this make believe land I've created in my mind where Oprah thinks I'm fascinating, where I still dance 30 ish hours a week, where I actually look good without make up, and where random love songs are written about me. Like this one:

This is actually completely the reason I'm posting anything. I'm in love with this song. I'm in love with how in love he is with whoever "her" is. It's fantastic. Listen to the whole thing. Ugh. One day a love song about me will be a reality....................right?

Poster.

Last night I made a facebook status update that read like this:

"I need a good cry, so I decided to watch Titanic. Problem.... I don't own Titanic. So I decided to stare at my Titanic poster for a while. Not the same effect.... who knew."

I don't know if you believed me. So I decided to take a picture:

Then I decided that you needed to see my other posters.

Justin Bieber.

This next one I stole this one from my mother before she passed away. I'm kind of glad she saw that we shared a strange love for him.

Christopher Reeves.

Anyway(S). There you have it. That's what takes up my doors. (I actually have a James Dean one that I LOVE... I just haven't hung it up. I need to get around to that now that I'm thinking about it)

Also.. I've been listening to alot of Garth Brooks lately, which has been just as magical as it sounds. Here is a song for your enjoyment:

okay okay okay Back to homework.

First and Third

I'll be checking a major thing off of my "Bucket List" this weekend.

To celebrate our one year anniversary, Paul and I are driving down to to watch my FAVORITE COMEDIAN OF ALL TIME:

Now keep in mind...We'll be doing that the DAY after we see my THIRD favorite comedian

This is going to be the funniest weekend of my life.

Chick Flick

I don't have chick flicks.

I don't like them.

(Titanic, Somewhere in Time, and Moulin Rouge don't count.... those are great films.)

So while this normally isn't a problem.... because normally when I put in a movie its to enjoy a good movie, not to cry.... it's bad when I want to cry.

SOLUTION!!! : Will Smith starred in a kick-a-freakin-good film...... that has a scene that WITHOUT FAIL.... I SOB during.

Ladies and Gentlemen... I present to you... the closest thing I have to a chick flick

Next Generation

....I miss my mom....

Old Man, Piano, Bow Tie

I bought a new album off itunes. it's like 120 piano solos.

I'm absolutely in love with the piano. and this is my newest favorite song.

Will

Have you ever just inexplicably connected with someone?

I have a lot to say about this man. I'll write about him later. Right now... just enjoy my latest song purchase of his.

Caithlyn and Mitchell

.............................*sigh..................................

Lost Cause

Don't think too much about it. Just enjoy a great song that happens to be "it" for tonight at 1 am.

May I Have This Dance?

ok.... ok ok ok ok..... OK! I admit it... While I HATE 97% of "Chick Flicks" I'm a hopeless romantic. This is probably one of my all time FAVORITE songs. I can put it on repeat and listen to it for probably an hour, easy. Aren't they wonderful? This song just makes me wanna slow dance in the kitchen. Go ahead.... try and tell me it doesn't do the same to you.

To love somebody

First off... I'm obsessed with this song. I can't stop listening to it actually. Can't. CAN NOT. I'm... in love.

Second off... on the note of being in love. I'm in love with both of these men. I own way too much of each of their works of art, or musical tracks as you kids call it. I would marry both of them, purely for them to sing to me every now and again. That... and I kinda have a thing for Ray's facial hair. If I end up with either of them, it'll probably be Ray, even though I'm a bigger Damien fan. I think Damien might have some underlining anger issues, and possibly a drinking problem. That... and bad hair. Ray on the other hand... would just hold me and love me and ooo... that beard.

These are then men that have my heart.

Third off... One of my favorite things to do is to say "first off" then make a statement, then say "And B" then make a statement. I like to see if people catch me switching from numbers to letters. This gives me great joy and entertainment. Your welcome for not doing that here. No promises for future posts.

Almost.

I was told recently that I had an amazing ability to find the perfect song. The song that was the exact situation, just with music notes. Usually decorative piano between verses, instead of a defining silence between statements, gestures, or emotional expression.

This person simply restated something my mother used to tell me. She used to cry every time she'd watch me dance. She'd tear up when I'd be laying on the floor telling her about a song, what each lyric meant, what each cord meant, and why it ended the way that it did. She always told me I connected with music and understood music in a way that admirable. This was an amazing compliment coming from a musician such as herself.

So you can only image how frustrating this past month has been. Trying to find the right song. The song that states the reality of him being gone. That states the fact that he asked me to stay. That shows the aggravation. That states "I"m happy you're happy," but "I really wish you'd change your mind." That expresses the flat out... What the heck?!

This song... isn't it. The melody is wrong. The singer isn't the one who should be singing it. And the piano isn't right. But the lyrics are close. This is the song that I'm calling "almost". I refuse to say that it is the song, because it's not. But this is the song that I'm accepting till I find THE song. And maybe by then it'll be "Rootless Tree" (by Damien Rice) (don't look that one up. it swears a lot) or "Look at You Now" (by Joe Purdy). But I'm sick of over playing "Pretty Things" (by Jay Nash, Matt Duke & Tony Lucca), "It Doesn't Hurt" (by Katie Thompson), and "Romeo and Juliet" (performed by Matt Nathanson......(this is my false hope song)). I've attempted to convince myself that "Some Things Don't Work Out" (by Joe Purdy) is the song... but it's not. Because it could have. There are so many other songs that I've listened to over and over again, that one line fits, or the violin is perfect. But rather than sharing all of them, I'm going to leave it as these. Because I feel that you are getting the point. If you haven't, please tell me, I've got about 10 more I'd be happy to share.

(I heard today that my posts are too long... that's why nobody really reads them.... *cough*)

Ladies and Gentlemen. Here is Almost the Song.

Gratitude

Probably the greatest video on the internet. I watch this on a regular basis. Keeps me thankful. And annoyed with those who aren't :)

The Conversation

I wasn't going to post this till tomorrow. But here I am... posting it today.

This is the conversation I had on Feb. 2, 2011. Almost to a T. This is has always been one of my favorite songs... But never a song I wanted to empathize with. Never a song I wanted to hear simply spoken by a man sitting on my couch. But it happened. And here is the song, that fits perfectly.

Hillary Facebook Photo Challenge

This is my 30 Day photo Thing... condensed into 4 minutes. ENJOY! There is no music to the video- so feel free to pick your own.